Friday, June 3

Chain Letter

I was wondering today why the hell people forward stupid-ass e-mails that don't mean shit and that can't possibly be true. So I decided to create one just to see what it felt like. Please send the following chain letter to everyone you know. Seriously.

"Once upon a time there was a meaningless story that had absolutely nothing to do with any sort of moral that the promulgators of said tale were trying to convey to their audience. As a result of this, AOL/Time-Warner/MSN/HBO/PFLAG have agreed that for every person who receives this e-mail, they will donate one nickel to the 'Save the Kid' fund. And did you know that in the Q'uran in Chapter 9 verse 11 (9:11.....get it?) it says that the eagle (hmmm, America!?) will destroy the Muslims and peace will rain. You know, it's funny...we have time for TV, time for magazines, time to pay the bills, but we never have time for God. Forward this to at least seven people who you want God to touch. Now QUICK! Make a wish.
Scroll down.
Too far.
Okay, now send this to the amount of people you want to make a wish to. Not only will your wish come true, but AOL/Time-Warner/HBO/MADD/NWO will donate a nickel for every person who receives this e-mail to a starving Ethiopian child who needs dysentery me, forwarding this e-mail is much easier and more effective than actually helping out a starving Albanian kid with dysentery yourself. Did I say Albanian? I meant Ethiopian.
And did you hear that MSN is shutting down Hotmail? They want everyone to forward this to everyone in their address books because, again, it's much more effective than sending out an e-mail with the announcement themselves. Also, by forwarding this, you'll be helping HBO/FBI/CIA/NWO get a nickel from Albanian kids in the Q'uran who need to have time for God. I mean, Ethiopian kids.
But the important thing is that there's a little girl missing, and by forwarding this you'll be giving her to POS/SOB/ODB/SOL via a nickel from every Ethiopian (Albanian?) kid who has a wish AND your crush will talk to you if you send it to fifty people or more, but as we all know America is right and so is Jesus, so forward this e-mail or your penis will fall off.

Seriously, forward this to everyone you know. Then bring me a drink. Save the Ethiopian kids and the NRA and wipe out terrorism while saving your e-mail from deletion and getting your crush to notice you, because for every nickel you donate another e-mail like this one gets forwarded. But the moral of the story can be found here:"

I think it's self-explanatory.
Click this shit!

1 Bullshit Responses:

Anonymous IWU alum left the following bullshit...

Haha, that was awesome. I fuckin' hate those foward e-mails too. It's the worst when they tell you to send it to every person you know, including the person that sent it to you. And my mom sends it every fucking time. Gosh!

11:56 PM  

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