Tuesday, April 26

An open letter to all the women with whom I've slept

To Whom It May Concern:

I realize that it makes you feel better as a person and gives you an overall more secure sense of self-worth to claim that I only used you for sex; however, a statement such as this one is complete slanderous bullshit, and I would appreciate it if you stopped.
To the One Night Standers: I know that you're pissed because we were never officially "dating" when we had sex, and that I didn't consider you worthy of the time it would have taken me to get to know you on something more than a superficial level. However, that's you're fault, not mine. Perhaps if you were a more interesting person I would have taken the time to get to know the "real you" before I snuck out of your room at three in the morning with my shoes in my hand. Maybe if you had given any indication at all of being worth my time I wouldn't have gone back to the same shitty party where I picked you up and picked up another woman in order to wash the your taste out of my mouth. If we both had some self-respect, we know that this wouldn't have happened, so stop pretending like I took advantage of you while you were in a state of complete alcoholic irresponsibility after you drank half a glass of shitty keg beer; I didn't. Remember, you were the ones who suggested that we "go someplace else", not me. Reevaluate the situations - who was using whom?
To the Women I Got to Know Fairly Well: You were definitely worth the time it took to get to know you. I didn't ever regret our conversations, and I think you're all great people. However, I think that your bullshit is what killed our friendships, not my alleged one-track mind. When we started sleeping together, I made damn sure that you knew what this was. I never claimed to be faithful to you, and I wasn't. I can't think of a single one of you I was "faithful" to. I told you that we were friends who would fuck, and we were. You were completely informed. I didn't hold anything back from you. However, when you started demanding that I sleep over or gave me a jealous look when I talked to other girls, then it was over. I decided that sleeping together was too much of a strain on our friendship. When the sex stopped, you stopped our friendship. It wasn't the other way around. Think about this for a second: who was using whom for sex there? Certainly not me. Please stop lying to yourself and claiming that I was only interested in you for sex. You seem to so easily neglect the months we knew each other prior to the sex. If you really think that I waited that long just so we could have a couple of thirty-second romps in your bed, you are mistaken. I like you as a person. Well, I did until you turned into a bitching self-loving blame-externalizing fuckrod. Also, I'd like to point out that not one of you had to be talked into sex with me. You all did that willingly enough. It was talking you out of the sex that was the hard part.
To the Women I Was Dating When I Slept With Them: None of this applies to you.

I'm sick of you all claiming that I was just into you for the sex. I didn't rape anyone; you were all willing participants. Stop being such a bunch of fucking whiners - if I wanted to have sex with crybabies I'd go hang around the kindergarten jungle gym like my creepy uncle.

Oh yeah, I forgot that there are a couple of you whose names I don't know...I did just use you for sex. Deal with it.


The Angry Drunken Irishman

P.S. Bring me a drink. That way I can be using you for sex and bar service.
Click this shit!

9 Bullshit Responses:

Blogger bulb left the following bullshit...

But....... but....... you said you loved me!

7:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous left the following bullshit...

Austin, you're such an ass. You shoudn't have sex with people you've been long-term friends with because good friendship+sex=what most women want in a relationship. (We've all seen far too many movies where the best friends fall in love at the end).
For future reference, if a woman you're friends with has sex with you, it's because there's something there for her.
For me, if I slept with a close friend, I would find myself very romantically entangled. In fact, I don't believe any really close relationships between men and women are without some kind of longing on the part of one or the other. And I think you know this, too. The reason they slept with you so easily was because they liked you and your I-take-care-of-people demeanor. Duh.
Well, now you know. Although I think you knew before. Please, boink responsibly in the future.

7:46 AM  
Blogger The Angry Drunken Irishman left the following bullshit...

You're missing the main point of this letter, my dear Anonymous. I'm pissed at all the women who claimed I was just using them for sex in order to justify their actions to themselves. They think, "Oh, nothing came of this, but I don't want to feel like a whore, so I'll just say he used me for sex." That's bullshit.

11:13 AM  
Blogger Kate left the following bullshit...

So...where does that leave me if I used YOU?

8:20 AM  
Blogger The Angry Drunken Irishman left the following bullshit...

Kate, that leaves you....

on top. 'Nuff said. And this letter doesn't apply to you, by the way.

7:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous left the following bullshit...

how many people have you slept with?

1:06 PM  
Anonymous Ren left the following bullshit...

Austin- on behalf of all the women that have ever slept with you- did it ever occur to you that maybe you were worth the time... at the time? Writing posts like this might make them wonder- even regret. Yes, people can get over-emotional and can get too attached too fast, but some genuinely care and don't deserve to be hurt like this. Beyond that, I don't think it's fair for you to put yourself above all of these women when you are at the same level. And to all the ladies that think I'm wrong, you should know that there is a very large lie in his post.

1:14 PM  
Blogger The Angry Drunken Irishman left the following bullshit...

This post was written largely in response to a rash of women claiming I used them "only for sex". I'm sick of that bullshit, and I'm sick of people claiming that I'm some sort of bad guy. You can't handle it? Tough shit, that's life. I'm fucking sick of it. The bitch of it is, the people who are claiming that I only used them for sex are people I genuinely cared about. It fucking makes me mad. Re-read the entire post, Ren, and then see if you still feel the same way. As usual, I think you missed the point.

5:24 PM  
Anonymous Ren left the following bullshit...

Reread the last paragraph of your original post, Austin.
I reread the entire thing, and didn't miss the point, but did you ever stop to consider that maybe there's a reason these women are saying what they're saying? Actions speak louder than words, babe. If this has become such a problem for you, maybe you shouldn't have slept with them in the first place.

12:16 PM  

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